this is a story written by Boudicca Rising about an incident that happened when her cat was determined to get in on the act. Personal belief of anyone else is none of my business and I will delete any comments that are in anyway intolerant from any side.
For years, after a plague of evangelical Christians on my doorstep, I
have been left alone to pretty much get on with my Pagan life.
tonight. Tonight, there was a tentative knock at the door. I knew
before I answered it that it might involve somebody selling something.
My friends all rap on the door smartly as I am a bit hard of hearing.
This was a soft-as-micies-sleeping knock so I just knew …
the door, I recognised the lady from way back. Bless her, several years
on and still gamely knocking on people’s doors so that others may knock
on the pearly gates.
I stood through the usual schpiel and
pro-offered pamphlet to join her at the Group Hug of the Holy Spirit
Tabernacle Bigots Society or some such; said thanks but no thanks, I was
Pagan … and then my troubles started
How long had I been a Pagan? How interesting. How did I found out
about it? Wow. Did I not think that the bible really, truly held the
truth? No, oh goodness. She was actually very sweet.
But at this
point, a demon cat intervened. Poppet loves the front garden. He loves
the front garden so much that he is not allowed outside when I am not
home, as I (and my neighbours) have to keep on removing him from the
front and putting him round the back. I am well aware of his fixation
with the front door as he has, on many occasions, bested me and dived
out of it.
Whilst chatting to her, I explained why I was holding the
door closed. Poppet got tired of trying to push his nose through my
legs (this lasted throughout the topic of whether or not the Romans were
here before Christ). Right at the point where I mentioned Augustine,
Poppet decided that jumping on my back was an option, so Religious Lady
was suddenly confronted by a white grinning cat face looming at her from
the dark. She shrieked (and may have peed a little).
But gamely on
she went. I am not sure whether anyone has tried to remove a cat from
their back whilst holding a door to with one hand – but it is not easy
and rather painful, ultimately achievable by being flexible enough to
grab hold of cat whilst sending “I’m going to deprive you of fresh fish
for a week” thoughts through the human-animal subconscious divide.
Objective achieved and “Ah, so you worship many Gods?” she asked. “Yes” I
replied. “Which ones?” she asked. So I explained. I have to admit
being impressed by the homework she had done. Poppet tried the scratch
down the leg trick but I felt it coming and finally, all went quiet.
We continued chatting back and forth – we had got onto the Koran (we
had already covered Hinduism). I was starting to lose steam and
Suddenly, there was a small, breathless squeak from the
lady, who was looking down in horror. Poppet, having attempted every
which way to escape out the front, had managed to squeeze his head under
the door. And, teeth bared and eyes wide, was staring up at us like so
much decapitated cat.
I paused for a second, checked that his body
was truly behind the door, said “excuse me” and told him off for being
brainless. Foiled again, he withdrew and stomped off on four paws into
the front room to have a sulk.
“So”, I said, “where were we?”. However, Decap Cat had clearly wrong-footed her and she quickly made her excuses and left.
I bet I am now down as the nice Pagan lady who doesn’t mind a chat but has demonically possessed cats.
full version may be read on Boudicca's blog here